The Truth about Blogging:
I continually have the same conversation with friends:
“You do so much with your kids!”
“You make me feel like an inadequate mom when I see all you do.”
“How do you have time to do all that?”
“Can’t your kids just watch TV and eat Kraft dinner?”
This is when I say to them:
“The problem with things like Facebook and blogs is that you only show people the side of things that you want them to see!”
One doesn’t post pictures of getting frustrated with your kids, yelling at your husband, the cake that flops, or the family trip that is a disaster.
When I tell my friends what happens behind the scenes, they laugh and say, “now, that makes me feel better!”
They have encouraged me to, in my blogs, tell some of the funnier or behind-the-scene moments.
The problem with having a blog is that your life becomes an open book. My issue is that my husband and kids did not sign up for their lives to be displayed like this, and I don’t want to embarrass any of them. It’s finding the right balance in telling the real story.
Let me lay out a few truths for you.
1. You don’t have to do it all! “I feel like I should do all these things with my kids, too, but I don’t enjoy it”. I hear this a lot. Find your own groove as a mom. Not someone else’s.
A couple of things about me.
o I am an extrovert. I am not shy. I am big. My hair is big. My personality is big. My size is big. I am out there, and I can be overwhelming. So, I am more apt to put myself out there with my kids, and not be bothered by it. My oldest son is also an extrovert, but my husband and younger son are much more introverted.
• I am an organizer and event planner. From the days on the playground, to planning high school parties, and now fundraising events – I love to plan and organize events. I even went to school and got a public relations degree just so I could do more of it.
• I used to teach. I was a Girl Guide Brownie leader for years, and then taught English in Japan for three years. I am used to putting together lesson plans and doing activities with objectives, and I enjoy it!
2. My kids beg me to stay home. I love adventure and I love being on the go. I always want to be doing something. Sometimes my kids beg me, “no more adventures mom! I just want to stay home and play!”
3. My kids are not easy. I love them to death, and they are my pride and joy, but these boys (8 and 9) are not easy. They are extremely active. If you think you have active kids, please trade with me for a week – a day or even an hour.
It wasn’t until my youngest was almost 5 that I could actually take the kids by myself in public, with confidence. One would always run away, run ahead, or get into mischief and I couldn’t physically handle them both at once.
About my older son, people say – “does he ever stop moving?” No, he doesn’t. Not even when he is sleeping. You should see his bed in the morning. I used to dress them constantly in shirts with hoods so I would have something to grab.
I had to keep busy with them, or I would lose my ever-loving mind!
They are not so crazy now, but still incredibly active, and now confident with no sense of fear. I’m in trouble.
4. My kids aren’t perfect. Besides being active, they get into trouble like many little boys. They have been in the principal’s office countless times. The best advice I received, and that I follow is to volunteer a lot at the school (to not only make up for the behaviour, but to also know the principal and teachers) and to give your child’s teacher a really nice gift at the end of the year!
5. My kids are rough. They are rough and tumble boys, and they have both put each other in the emergency room at the hospital. One nearly had a broken leg and the other with a concussion. I expect we will be spending a lot of time there over the next few years. The emergency room doctor suggested we put him on speed dial.
6. My kids watch a lot of TV and they eat sugar and not enough vegetables. Sometimes it just makes for less of a fight.
7. When the kids were younger and we were out at a playgroup or a playdate and a child cried, my first reaction was always… not, is my child ok, but, did my child do it??
I just had this conversation with the school principal who was calling me about PTA information.
My heart stops each time the school phones the house. Are the kids in trouble?
8. I often have to threaten the kids to take NICE pictures so I can post them on the blog or Facebook.
9. I swear a lot. Sometimes in front of the kids. I drink a lot of wine. I spend lots of hours commiserating with my girlfriends. My house is a mess. My kids say I spend too much time on the computer. I argue with my husband – a lot. I constantly feel mommy guilt.
There is my life in a nutshell. Open book. Life as a mom of two active boys is not easy sometimes, but it is always fun and you never know what you’re going to get.
I am not a super mom, but I am a super mom for these boys.
So, I urge you. When you are writing on your blog, take a moment to think about how you are conveying your story. Are you showing that your life is picture perfect?
Was there a funny story? Did your kids complain or have a meltdown in the middle of the hike or craft?
Make your blog believable and something that people can relate to and not another achievable mommy moment!